A Young Elf Named Doyle - Funny Christmas Elf Limerick for Kids

There was a young elf named Doyle
Who covered his ears in tin foil.
When friends asked him why
He said in reply.
"It saves them from dust, dirt, and oil."

There Was A Young Lady Named Dolly - Vintage Christmas Limerick Postcard

There was a young lady named Dolly
Who exclaimed, "I do so love holly
But if you must know
I prefer mistletoe
For to kiss underneath it is jolly."

There Once Was a Pie Named Trish - Thanksgiving Pumpkin Pie Limericks

There once was a pie named Trish
She happily sat in a dish
Pumpkin and spice
And everything nice
Made Trish completely delish!

There Was An Old Farmer Named Frankie - Thanksgiving Turkey Limerick

There is an old farmer named Franky,

His mistake at the gate made him cranky,

Since he left it ajar,

The turkey ran far,

And he blew his big nose in his hanky.

There Is an Old Bird Named Nancy - Thanksgiving Limerick Poem for Kids

There is an old bird named Nancy

Try as she might, she can't see

Her life passed her by

In the blink of an eye

And she no longer has the man's fancy.

There Once was a Boy Named Terry - Scary Spider Limerick for Kids

There once was a boy named Terry
Who ate a black bug on a dare, he
Fell over in pain
As he tried to explain
That he didn't think spiders were scary.

It - A Scary Clown Limerick

So what makes this clown so scary
With kids and adults so wary?
In movies and books
He gives creepy looks
With a balloon the hue of a cherry.

Headless Horseman Halloween Limerick (Sleepy Hollow)

There once was a man with no head
The thought of him filled me with dread
The man and his horse
Were a dream, of course
I crooned as I trembled in bed.

In Killarney There Lived An Old Dame - Vintage Limerick

In Killarney, there lived an old dame
Who for walking, grew too stiff and lame;
So she mounted a pig,
And set off at a jig,
To the market that lively old dame.

Phillips 66 Advertising Limerick

A frantic mechanic named Crocket,
Got so mad at his car he could hock it,
But his wife, she said, "Nix!
It just needs '66'",
Now it starts every time like a rocket!

Vintage Boat Limerick - Mary Butler

There was a young boy from Lough Ree,
Who wanted to travel the sea.
So he built a small boat,
And set it afloat,
But forgot to get in it you see!

A Good Friday - Easter Miracle Limerick

When the guilt of sin does seize us,
We should turn to our brother, Jesus,
His death on the cross,
Was truly a loss,
But the miracle on Easter - it frees us.

Little Jack Horner Limerick Postcard

Little Jack Horner stood on the corner
Waiting to catch a car
He was hit by the wheel
Of an automobile
And he never got over the jar.

The Secret Mystery of St. Patrick Revealed in Limerick Verse!

Nothing but limericks I write

No subject’s too big or too trite

So here’s a true story

That isn’t too gory

About a young lad’s dreadful plight

In Scotland, did young Patrick dwell

His life was comfy and swell

Irish brigands did float

To his home in a boat

And took him to Ireland to sell

In Ireland, Pat was a slave

And he did his best to behave

He herded the swine

Till given a sign

And left without even a wave

To home, as fast as he could

He thought, was proper and good

But he had a vision

And made a decision –

Return to Ireland he would

For Patrick, this wasn’t a game

So first, a priest he became

He returned to the isle

With nary a smile

And focused on spreading Christ’s name

There were many bad serpents about

But Patrick had never a doubt

With force he did pray

Each and every day

And the devils and snakes he cast out

So party, green beer and all

But please do your best to recall

That Patrick’s the reason

For this happy season

As you finish your pub-to-pub crawl

Copyright 2017

Ash Wednesday Limerick Poem

Today is the first day of Lent,
It's time for all souls to repent,
And with His good grace,
It's He that you'll face,
And you'll know what His sacrifice meant.



Who Is Your Favorite President - A Presidents Day Limerick

Now President's Day is nigh
So who is your favorite guy?
A William or John,
Or maybe a Don,
Or the one who could not tell a lie?

I've studied the 44 men*
And made up my mind only when
After much thinkin'
Decided that Lincoln
Was clearly the best that has been.

* Donald Trump is the 45th President, but Grover Cleveland was president for two nonconsective terms, so only 44 different men have been President

DragonVale Thistle Dragon Limerick

There once was a dragon named Thistle
Who dreamt of a day it could whistle
It huffed and it puffed
Till its tale was quite fluffed
But the best it could do was a sniffle.

An Old Miser Named Clarence - Classic Ogden Nash Limerick

There was an old miser named Clarence, 
Who simonized both of his parents. 
"The initial expense," 
He remarked, "is immense, 
But I'll save it on wearance and tearance."